Read this on Facebook:
“Every great work, every big accomplishment, has been brought into manifestation through holding to the vision, and often just before the big achievement, comes apparent failure and discouragement.”
― Florence Scovel Shinn
I am very much in the apparent failure and discouragement place. I'm hoping this is the dark before something really big. I'm applying for a job I want so bad... At first I was very optimistic, but as time goes on I'm finding it hard to stay positive. This opportunity is life altering and the type of career I've worked more than 3 years nonstop to obtain. I'm throwing myself a pity party tonight. I've put heart and soul into VGB and VGB Studios but sometimes I don't feel like I get the recognition. I think the listeners and viewers who mess with me the most don't realize how hard I work for the podcast and the sacrifices I've made. All I can do at this point to is succeed. Whether it's through VGB, the potential new job, or something I have not even thought of yet.. I gotta make it. Failure isn't on the table... Do I want to be well liked? Do I want to be successful in my current endeavor? Can I have both? Am I hated? Am I respected? Am I overrated? Am I a bad guy? Am I unlikeable? Are people just jealous? I think I'm just tired... I love my public/not public little diary here.. I hope it can help other people struggling with similar issues. I'm a kid who was forced to grow up way sooner than he should have. Dealt with a psychologically abusive/ drug addict parent. Overcame the odds and lived the American dream. That's what I want my story to be. I'm rambling..
Goodnight
